How to Run When I Have No Perseverance

I have a deep core memory in my head from grade school:
It was a beautiful, warm and sunny spring day. We were outside on the open field for P.E. class. Our teacher made us stand in two single file lines, basically pairing us off. My teacher said, "go!" The first two kids in each line sprinted away to the big telephone pole which was the finish. 

The first kid to get to the pole won, obviously. That kid got to go on and race again. The races continued until the four fastest kids were determined; they would ultimately run the four by four relay during or "track and field" day. 

I was excited and eagerly anticipating my turn to race. I was super fast. I ran all over the place. Plus, the previous year, I placed THIRD in the long jump, and you have to be fast to jump that far, right?

Then, I looked to my right and realized I was racing Debbie Nelson. Tall, long legged, totally athletic Debbie Nelson. 

Crap.

There went my dreams of running the four by four relay.



I can so very clearly picture Debbie steadily pulling farther and farther and farther away from me. I can so very clearly remember the tension in my body from trying my hardest, but feeling like I was moving in slow motion. She beat my by a landslide. Like a major, embarrassingly huge amount. Like she was done and recovered as I just crossed the finish line. 

Two weeks ago, my husband asked me how I was feeling.

What came to mind was the vision above, except it wasn't just Debbie so far ahead of me but EVERYONE IN THE WHOLE WORLD. I was feeling like everyone was racing ahead. Everyone had energy. Everyone was happy. Everyone had the endurance to finish strong while I felt tense, tired, slow, and alone. I was losing any perseverance to finish the race. I wanted to face plant and quit.

My husband wrote a song based on the scripture Phillipians 1:6

"Throw off everything that hinders and entangles us
Run with perseverance the race marked out for us
He is the author and finisher of our faith
LIFT UP YOUR EYES AND PLACE THEM ON JESUS"

If I just LIFT UP MY EYES. 

Even when I face plant, if I can just lift up my eyes a tiny bit, I see the feet of Jesus right in front of me. If I lift them a bit more, I can see his hand reaching down to help me up. In that vision, I know I am NOT alone. Knowing I am not alone gives me a little more energy to get up. Then, Jesus says, "You can do it, and I will be right here with you." I might have to lean on Him, but He will hold me up. In faith, I will gain strength to finish strong, but no matter what, he is in it to finish it with me!

How easily I forgot that He is with me. How on earth do I always end up thinking I can do it on my own? And knowing myself, I will gain energy and shove Jesus aside and inevitably, face plant again. 

Praise the Lord! He is always there when I lift up my eyes. 

God's grace is sufficient.

10 comments:

  1. That's really inspiring! I'm trying to do Bible study and fitness in the morning but currently struggling to buckle down and do either one! I've really got to work on it!

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    1. Thank you, Tiffany! I'm right there with you on needing to work on things...you are not alone : )

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  2. Such a super uplifting and inspiring post!

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  3. Beautiful post! I always appreciate inspirations that can push me to work toward my goals. Thanks for being a part of that for me today!

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  4. LOVE this!!!! What a great verse and this post is so full of motivation!

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  5. He will hold me fast! Jesus is my Strength, Song, and Author of Salvation. We can do all things with His help.

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  6. So inspiring. I am trying to recover from surgery a 2 months ago and need some motivation to get back out there and start exercising again. Thanks!

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